Dear Abby Greenhill: Volume 2

This is better than Saint Francis of Assisi and more impressive than the Dog Whisperer. It is almost as if Doctor Dolittle is incarnated. I now seems to understand animal language. Pets have questions and this is their place to ask them.
 On November 23, 2009, the first volumes of Dear Abby Greenhill and Helping Han were published online. The implications of these articles stretched near and far, reaching even some of the remotest crevices in this world. Pets were thrilled that they now had a means to express their concerns, reach out for help and get answers to their problems.

Pets everywhere are suffering. I have given an ear to their concerns. Today we hear from Schnauzers, a Chesapeake Retriever, a Boxer, a Bearded Collie and a Smooth Collie.

Dear Abby Greenhill:
My name is Gina and I am a Giant Schnauzer. Someday I would like to have puppies. Mickey, my potential stud, is a Miniature Schnauzer. If I mate with him and have a litter of puppies, will they become Standard Schnauzers, a mix of Giant Schnauzers and Miniature Schnauzer or something else all together?

Got to go,
Gina

Dear Abby Greenhill:
Hello Abby. I am Chip and I am a Chesapeake Retriever. There is another dog in our household. Her name is Polly and she is a Portuguese Water Dog. We had a great relationship until President Obama and his family selected a Portuguese Water Dog as their family pet. Since that time Polly has developed quite the attitude and superiority complex. As a fellow Retriever what do you recommend to restore our relationship?

Not Chipper,
Chip

Dear Abby Greenhill:
I am a Boxer puppy. My owners are boxing buffs. What do you think would be a good name for me?

Waiting Patiently,

Dear Abby Greenhill:
Please help me. My name is Benny the Bearded Collie. My beard always gets brown. My owners keep insist it tobacco stained. I constantly tell them I don't smoke, but they will not believe me. What shall I do?

Smokeless in Seattle,
Benny

Dear Abby Greenhill:
I am a Sally, a Smooth Coated Collie. I know that we are not as well known and as popular as Rough Coated Collies. I know there are many reasons that Rough Coated Collies are considered wonderful dogs. I was just hoping that you could use your page and writing skills to give us Smooth Coated Collies some recognition.

Shepherding,
Sally

I am pleased that all of these pets have placed their confidence in me to express their questions and concerns. That is where my expertise ends. Now I am must turn the matter over to my dear friend, Dear Abby Greenhill.

Abby responds with Helping Han Van Meegerin: Volume 2

Disclaimer: This is article is only for entertainment purposes and is not based on reality.

Image Copyright: Abby Greenhill Express written consent obtained to use with this post. No further use is allowed.

Copyrighted and originally published on Y!CN (Yahoo! Contributor Network on December 15, 2009).